Below are the 13 most recent journal entries recorded in chrisschulte's LiveJournal:

Saturday, September 30th, 2006
9:27 am	Lots and lots of stuff Well, let's see, it's been since what, february or march since I've updated this thing? A lot has happened in my life, but not a lot as well. First, my sister and her family moved in with me and my parents. Talk about a crowded house! Oh well, life is. My x wife got engaged, I've dated two different women, really pissed off two different women, and have switched cell phone services three times. (like that's really a big deal) Anyway, I also passed my extra class ham radio test, which for those of you who don't know what that means, it means that I now have the highest class of license granted to amateur radio operators here in the United States. If there are any hams out there, my callsign is now ab8wo which is totally different from kc8zsj. I honestly should have kept that though, since I had to change a lot of e-mm ail addresses and usernames and stuff like that. Ah well, again, life is. I sit here on this cold and rainy saturday morning just thinking about life and my plans for the future. The afore mentioned plans having changed in the last seven months at least seven times. This time; however, I think I have finally figured things out. I'm medicated now, and that makes a huge difference. Which reminds me, I need to call that prescription in on monday. Well, I'm off, I'll hopefully be more faithful in writing in this journal. Yall take care now, you hear? Current Mood: contemplative (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 16th, 2006
10:54 pm	Long time no write Wow! It's been a couple of months! Let's see, since you last heard from me, I was bitching about something or other, and now I don't even remember what it was that I was bitching about. *smile* Anyway, I've been kind of depressed over the last oh, five minutes or so, and decided to just write in here because if I didn't, my fingers ould forget how to do it. So, I'm listening to a Rascal Flatts song, and thinking about my last marriage, and realizing how much of a fuck up I really am. That's really it, that's the crux of my depression for the night, I'm a ginormous fuck up. I'm such a big fuck up, that I hold the world's record for times fucking up in my life, it started when I was born. It's all a matter of communication with my x wife and I, and you'd think that me being blind, I could have listened to her, and figured out what she wanted, needed, and desired, but I didn't until it was much too late. Story of my life I guess. It's all so simple, I'll explain it in the next paragraph. So with that, onward and upward or whatever direction it is. The simplicity is so amazing, I'm shocked that I didn't see it before. Here's me, being my happy stupid fuck up self, and there's my wife, trying to talk to me, trying to figure out what I'm thinking/feeling/wanting/needing, and here's me again not hearing her ask me when she's practically shouting it at the top of her lungs. But I ignore her because I know what I'm doing, and she doesn't know her head from her boobs (which are quite big for those who care). Well, the bottomline is her and I both made a huge mistake, but if I could only show her that I know it, and how sorry I am for the things that I've done, I'd feel so much better. I'm not asking for her back, that just wouldn't work, besides, there's someone out there better suited for me. What I really want is to show her, tell her somehow just how sorry I am for hurting her as badly as I hurt her. Yes, Megan is very critical, and hipocritical for that matter, but she still is a human being with feelings, and I didn't even think of respecting those feelings that she has. Well, I guess that's all I have to say about that point. Will write more some other time, but don't hold your collective breath, I'd hate for the few people who read this on a relatively regular basis to die because they were waiting for me to update again and it took another two months or three like it did the last time. On that note, don't fuck too much, you'll get sore. Current Mood: depressed Current Music: What Hurts The Most, Rascal Flatts (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, March 26th, 2006
8:01 am	Sleepy sunday, again Well, I got about seven hours last night, but it still wasn't enough. I woke up this morning and thought that I had more trouble getting out ofbed today than I did last weekend. No matter though, it looks like the parents are going to start going to their camper traylor within the next two to three weeks each weekend, which means that I won't have to get up anymore. At least not for the next four months or so. I'm feeling rather good this particular morning, and I really don't know why. I have to see the cunt today, that is always a lovely experience. It's a lot more difficult to go to church knowing that your money grubbing cunt of an x wife is there than it is to go to a church that she doesn't go to. Maybe if I talk to the minister nicely, he can have her thrown out. That would be rich. *laughs* Anyway, I'm running out of stuff to ramble about, so I'll be going now. Yall take care, and now that I know that at least one person reads this on a semi-regular basis, I'll try and update more often. Until next time... Current Mood: content (Comment on this)
Thursday, March 23rd, 2006
12:59 pm	Really really pissed at this point. My x wife is a dirty cunt! Now I know that's not the best way to start a journal entry, but she is indeed a bitch, a whore, a money grubbing slut and everything else that goes along with it. I hope she dies. I hope she burns in hell, I hope that she catches cancer and never recovers from it. I hope that she goes through so much pain, that we hear the screams from her little apartment where ever she is, all the way to the east coast. I can't believe that I even loved that cum guzzling bitch! Oh, by the way, my appeal for financial aid was denied as well, so life fucking sucks right now. Anyway, that's pretty much the way it goes. I hate my x wife, she needs to be killed slowly and painfully, and I need cash. Have a good day all. Current Mood: pissed off (Comment on this)
Sunday, March 12th, 2006
7:57 am	Sleepy sunday Well, it's sunday, and at the time that my alarm clock went off, I came to the realization that my sleeping schedule is really jacked up. Considering the fact that everyday for this last week, I've gone to bed at like three o'clock in the morning. This makes for sleeping very late the following day, but the problem is that when you have to get up very early, (as I had to this morning) it leads to a difficult day. I still haven't heard anything from the college on my appeal, and this is most annoying as I really need to know so I can make plans if need be. Well, that's really the big deal in my life right now. Meeka and I still talk, but I have this feeling that by my constantly calling her for like two weeks in a row, I pushed her away. That's all right, because I really don't have the financial means to treat her the way she deserves to be treated. Other than that, nothing really to write about. Not so sure that I'm going to be updating everyday for a while, as I really don't do much each day, so it will probably be more like a weekly thing for the next couple of months, but we'll see. Peace out and don't hurt anyone. Current Mood: tired (Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 7th, 2006
6:49 pm	Bored, bored, bored, bored, bored Today I gave plasma as usual, and went up to the college. I had some financial aid stuff to fill out. Hopefully the Ppeal process finishes up in my favor. Other than that, not much going on this week. Getting excited about the beginning of baseball season, which is just around the corner. Well, that's today's writing, love peace and chicken greece. Current Mood: bored (Comment on this)
Sunday, March 5th, 2006
8:19 am	A week of interest Well, let's see... I finally have the laptop, am using it to write this as a matter of fact. Haven't heard from Meeka since like wednesday, so I think I'll call her tonight after not calling her at all yesterday. I found out that my friend Missy wants to have a relationship with me, all of this after her telling me for the longest time that she wasn't ready for a relationship, so what do I do? I move on, and now she is hurt. Women, can't live with them, can't slap them. Nothing else of importance to discuss, so I'll bail right now. Hopefully I'll have more to write later. Peace out. Current Mood: tired (Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 28th, 2006
9:41 am	that's a lot of water. Well, I spent most of yesterday drinking. Drinking water that is. I bought a six pack of these twenty-four ounce bottles of Coke last week, and instead of putting the bottles out for recycling, I decided to fill them with water for drinking the day before I have to give plasma. That equals 144 ounces of water, and let me just say, I don't think my blatter had recovered yet. *smiles* Didn't talk to Meeka that much yesterday, but I did talk to her briefly. For some reason, I have the feeling that we won't talk a lot during the week, as we both have cell phones as our primary means of communication, and neither of our minutes start before nine o'clock. Either that, or she's being distant from me because she doesn't want to hang out with me anymore, and if that's the case, well...I hope she's honest about it and just tells me up front. Anyway, off to get poked. Laptop comes on friday! Yay! Current Mood: blah (Comment on this)
Saturday, February 25th, 2006
10:09 am	Everyday is a saturday, except for saturdays themselves. Strange subject line, I know, but I figured I'd be wierd today. I'm still just absolutely thrilled with the conversation that I had with Meeka last night. We just talked, I mean it got a little well...personal, but it was all in all, an awesome conversation. We really seem to just click and talk, and to think, I was nervous about talking to her when I first met her. This all being said, I'm not necessarily putting us in a church exchanging rings and wedding vowes, but the fact that I was able to carry on an inteligent conversation with someone who is my age and lives in the same county that I do is just amazing to me and thrills me to no end. That's really all that I have for now, it's still just counting down the days until the laptop gets here, and I can have total net freedom from my parents. Write more later, piece! Current Mood: bouncy (Comment on this)
Thursday, February 23rd, 2006
7:36 pm	welcome distractions Today I ordered my new laptop. It's going to cost me way more than it's worth, as I'm renting to own it, but it's all that I can do at this point. I'll go and pick it up next friday, and hopefully have everything up and running by the end of next weekend. The meaning of this is two fold. First, I'll be off of my parents' computer, which I'm sure they'll be greatful for. Second, it will allow me to start from the beginning again. I'm going to finally be able to start rebuilding the posessions that I lost in Austin. THat really has been the highlight of my day. I spoke with Meeka last night, she's a young lady that I am most taken with. I'm hoping to get to know her, and most importantly develope a friendship with her. I'm still sticking to my six month plan. I'm not dating anyone for six months. I think it will be healthy for me. After which time, I'll sit down and evaluate where I'm at in my life. If I'm still sitting at home, and not going to school, well then I guess I still need more time. If I'm at school and am doing well, then maybe I can consider a relationship. All of that is to be determined on a larger number of facts then just whether or not I'm going to school again. ANyway, I'm out of here. As I say on the zone, love, piece and chicken greece. Current Mood: contemplative (Comment on this)
Monday, February 20th, 2006
6:18 pm	Well, another day and not another dollar. Well, the subject line says it all. I went to go and sell plasma today, and was unable to as my heart rate was at 118 the first time and 122 the second. I'm really not feeling all that well, haven't been since like wednesday, but I figured I could probably get away with it, turns out I can't. Oh well, better luck next time. Nothing really much is happening here, just trying to decide if I want to do stupid things, or not, and so the wonder that is time rolls on. It was presidents day today. This is a holiday that I really don't understand, simply because there's really nothing done to celebrate it. Noone gives gifts, noone has large barbecues or anything of the sort. It's just well, there. Not much other else to write, other than I'm disappointed that I couldn't endulge myself in another two hours of MASH episodes that I've already seen like eighty-three times or something. I'm out, more tomorrow, maybe. Current Mood: blah (Comment on this)
Saturday, February 18th, 2006
11:47 am	Bored, sick, and back to writing stuff down for once. So, let's see, where do I begin. I haven't updated since oh, I don't know, the end of november? Got rid of Karrie, dated Sarah, dumped her, finalized the divorce with Megan, am staying up here in Michigan, and lost all of my stuff in Austin. There, now that that's all updated, on to the felings and such associated with these events. First, Karrie. She was clingy, didn't give me the space that I wanted her to give me, didn't give either of us the time that we both need, and all in all, behaved like an eighteen year-old. Gees, go figure. Sarah, was something that I really probably should have waited to do until after the divorce went final. While she did help me through a very tough time, there was the feeling as I told her of being held hostage by my passed. Yes, I'll admit I'm a jerk for cheating on Megan, and Christy for that matter, but when I'm trying my hardest to change, someone has to give me a chance, and she couldn't see that even though I was talking with someone who I've been friends with for six years, as well as an x girlfriend of mine, there wasn't going to be anything between us. She didn't see it, we fought, and I ended things. The divorce we'll save until last. My moving back to Michigan was something that I honestly think I did need to do, even if just for a little while. It's allowing me to take time and fix myself. Most people claim once a dog, always a dog, which can be true, but people are capible of changing. This time back here is allowing me to grow up and become the man that I want to be. Do I like the idea of being thirty years-old and living with my parents? No, but if I would have faced these issues earlier in my life, this wouldn't be a problem right now. Losing my stuff in Austin was unfortunate, as I trusted someone and they took me to thecleaners. Now, the divorce. I came back in november with the hopes of making things work between Megan and I, but she was having no part of it. I don't blame her, fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. Anyway, it went final on the second of this month, and I'm honestly just really numb. I don't feel anything, it's strange. I know I'm not going to date for a very long time, if ever again, and for once, I'm not really upset about that prospect. So, that's what's been going on in my life, hope you all thought it was interesting. I sure didn't, but hey, I've ben living it, the rest of you have just been watching, and laughing all the way. Current Mood: indescribable (Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 7th, 2005
3:18 pm	First entry in the new place. Well, this time I'll try and be more dilligent about posting at least once or twice a week. *laughs* Single now, Megan is filing for divorce, I didn't want her to do that, but I can't stop her. She wants me to pay half of the court costs, some say it's fair, is that I left her, some say it doesn't matter, she filed, she should pay. I feel this way. Sarah and I are getting awefully close. Neither of us are ready for commitment though, so things are taking a liesurely pace. Which is kind of how I like it. I'm moving back up here to the frozen tundra of Michigan, didn't want to, but it's a wise financial move, and after all, isn't that what dictates most of our adult lives anyway? Well, done for now, have fun all. Current Mood: blank (Comment on this)